Marriage Under the Cross: the Great Snare for Young Christians (Whitefield)

 

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A warning and encouragement from the 18th century Reformed pastor, George Whitefield in a sermon on the Marriage at Cana:

“But then, we may learn the reason why we have so many unhappy marriages in the world; it is because the parties concerned do not call Jesus Christ by prayer, nor ask the advice of his true disciples when they are about to marry: no; Christ and religion are the last things that are consulted and no wonder then if matches of the devil’s making (as all such are, which are contracted only on account of outward beauty, or for filthy lucre’s sake) prove most miserable, and grievous to be borne…

…I cannot but dwell a little on this particular; because I am persuaded the devil cannot lay a greater snare for young Christians, than to tempt them unequally to yoke themselves with unbelievers: as are all who are not born again of God…

…Let it suffice to advise all, whenever they enter into a marriage state, to imitate the people of Cana in Galilee, to call Christ to the marriage: he certainly will hear, and chose for you; and you will always find his choice to be best. He then will direct you to such yoke-fellows as shall be helps meet for you, in the great work of your salvation, and then he will also enable you to serve him without distraction, and cause you to walk, as Zachary and Elizabeth, in all his commandments and ordinances blameless.”


It is not good for man to be alone

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Below is an excerpt from Rev. Vander Hart’s book “Bible Studies on Genesis 1-11”, p. 65-66:

The King James Version of the Bible in Genesis 2:18,20, speaks of “help meet.” A new word – helpmeet – was coined as a result. But what does it mean? The word helper can have the idea in our language of servant, the assistant who stands in the background, perhaps the slave who has to “go for” this or “go for” that. But, in fact, the word is used many times in reference to God Himself as our heavenly Helper. Reflect on the following passages:

Exodus 18:4: “My father’s God was my helper.”

Deuteronomy 33:7: “Oh, be his help against his foes.”

Psalm 70:5: “You are my help and my deliverer.”

Psalm 121:1,2: “Where comes my help? My help comes from the LORD.”

Psalm 124:8: “Our help is in the name of the LORD, who made heaven and earth.”

Psalm 146:5: “The God of Jacob is our help.”

More passages could be cited, but the general meaning of help and helper begins to become clear. The word is not pejorative, inferring a put-down for the person called a helper. The word has almost the sense of rescuer or deliverer. The helper is the one who does for me what I could not do all by myself. God said that man’s calling as image-bearing ruler of the creation was such that being alone is not a good thing. Adam need help, and none of the animals would provide this help.

The word meet is better translated as suitable to, a counterpart for, one who corresponds to another in a complementary way. Thus the woman will be a helper who meets Adam’s need; she will, with him, help him fulfill mankind’s chief end, namely, to glorify God and enjoy Him forever (cf. Westminster Shorter Catechism, Q/A 1).

The text is not saying that she is a helper equal to the man (the original language could have said that, but it does not say this). The study note in the New Geneva Study Bible for Genesis 2:18 reads thus, “the word ‘helper’ entails his inadequacy, not her inferiority; for elsewhere it is used of God.” This is an important point to understand in our times. The woman is not inferior in her being because of the nature of her creation. Animals are not superior because they were made first. Nor is the ground superior because man came from the ground. Male and female constitute mankind, and both are created in the image of God. But within mankind (humanity), there is a relationship, an “economy,” of office-bearing. In their being image-bearers, man and woman are equally before the face of God our Father. In their respective offices, the man is the head of the woman, and “so there is a divinely imposed subordination here” (E.J. Young, In the Beginning, p. 77). At the same time the woman is a gift of a loving God to the man because our Lord knows that we can never make it all alone in fulfilling the divine plan for God’s creation kingdom. 


Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash